THE PLEASURE OF READING

I cannot remember when I started to enjoy reading. To read for the sheer pleasure of living in that well woven story and beyond. I cannot...

18 March 2015

Tomb for the words of our scarred love.




I loved him until our throats run dry. Now we must find an empty tomb to bury these shells. Shells of the words whose soul we have used up.

At first, we used words to learn each other. Flirting. We used words to exchange well timed compliments. Small talk. Sometimes simply to comment on the weather. Polite banter. Seductive whispers. We used up all the words.

Then we had to get a room. A room in which to do the things lovers do when left alone. Things that we were both too shy to say out loud. We created our own sign language. We didn't use words, he showed me and I showed him. Our bodies spoke for us.

I do not know at what point our throats opened up again. I cannot remember when the words returned to us. Only that these were alien words. Words whose soul was worn out, rugged. Our words had been warm. They had heated our hearts and inspired late night calls and saucy texts at dawn. Words that taught us to tear away each others clothes like thirsty lovers do. The kind of words that inspire untameable rhythms among lovers. Poetic. Our words were poetry.

Now I stay up late wondering when these alien words came to us. Insolent words. Quarrels and arguments. Where did the whispers said in a silky baritone die? Now the cruelty in his voice, is all I recognize. And the hate and accusations in my voice? How do I quell them? In the place of flirtations and seduction are words that work up storms. Words that clench fists and draw knives. Alien words. Or have we become the aliens?

We are no longer accustomed to mirthful banter. We have used up the soul of all our words. What do lovers say when love has dried up? Who has an empty tomb where the dead words of scarred love must be buried?

Photo credits: https://www.flickr.com/photos/carbonnyc/132922595

06 January 2015

Coffee with Mr. X



“'I will have tea, ginger tea if you have it. And a slice of vanilla cake.” I say to the plumb and tired-looking girl who comes to wait on our table.
“The same please.” He quips quickly.
I know he prefers black coffee, but he always had this habit of ordering the same things I did. He somehow always believed that I had great taste. That the food served on my plate was more delicious, that my sip added flavour to a blunt drink. As though my breathe purified the air around us. Clearly that hadn’t changed.
Well, it has been only three weeks. But something has changed in him. That he has found his manners now for instance. Today he said ‘please’ when he placed his order
I smile at his politeness, slowly taking in his features, and sizing him up. He is wearing the same shirt and jeans he had on the last time we went out. I remember remarking how that shade of blue complemented his skin. My smile broadens now as I think that that must be the reason he chose to wear them today. I lean back on my chair to peep at his feet; he has sneakers on, new ones.
Instinctively, he reaches out for my hands to hold them in his. His hands are unusually warm. He must have been rubbing them nervously as he waited for me. I like the thought that he’d been anxious about meeting me. He seems genuinely pleased that I showed up, and that I‘m smiling at him and letting him hold my hands in his.
I instantly feel a warm sensation run through me. It’s been long since I felt any excitement with him. I had begun to think that I’ve become sensually immune to him. He softly rubs the back of my palms and the sensation is somewhat arousing. It makes my skin yearn for his caresses. I’m forced to muse over the times we shared. I remember a time when there had been undeniable chemistry between us. I am reminded of the magic those manly hands worked on me. Oh, his hands! They made me warm, they gave me security. Those hands were always tender with me. Many are the times his hands aroused me. And brought me to orgasm. Those hands had an affair with my breasts. An affair so sweet it may well have been illicit.
I feel his stare on my face and suddenly I am aware of my reaction. Of the way my face must be shamelessly betraying my lust. So I pull my hands from his and fold them at my bosom as I try to bring my thoughts back to the present. I turn away as soon as I see the soft lines of his charred lips slowly form into a smile. He has definitely noticed the effect his touch has on me. And he is greatly flattered.
He mouths my name in that beguiling bass that he knows I can't resist. I turn my head to meet his eyes but a heat wave of desire almost blinds me. He doesn’t make this easy on me. He laughs, this time loudly, throwing back his head and letting his shoulders shake so vigorously that he attracts the attention of other patrons in the cafĂ©.
I feel naked, stripped. As though they can all see me blush. As though they all see how flush with desire my body is.
We do not have much of a conversation the rest of the evening. He talks, I listen. Obviously he has thought this through. I can sense he had prepared to plead, beseech and implore me to return to him. But my reaction to his touch has reawakened his ego, he will not beg. I regret that.  He now seems to remember that we have not broken up, at least not officially. So now he pretends to be oblivious of our last meeting. He has decided to forget that we had argued and I’d stormed away.
I quickly resolve that I am hungry and that I should have a proper meal. I gesture to the waitress and ask for garnished rice and marinated chicken stew. I also instruct her to pack my cake, I will have it later. I do not want tea anymore. It will only mask my appetite. He remains silent.

15 September 2014

Golden Anniversary


Here are the two poems I wrote for my grandparents on their 50th wedding anniversary. (2008)



SWEET UNION.

Heavens armies smiling upon
Heavens winds blowing upon
As two were holily united
Each said … ‘I do’.

They vowed
Vows as strong as a pebble in water
Vows that gave us life
For they vowed to give us life

Golden years together
Golden hearts together
And not just by luck
The maker of the universe… united.
You have lived to be phenomenons
Pillars of love
Towers of happiness
Sowers of life

Your humility and gentleness
Your kindness and faithfulness
Shall forever be examples
Upon eternity for us all.

With the pace you set for us
We have to succeed
We have reason to be
We have you.

You are our backbone
You influence all our lives
We love you
God loves you.




FIFTY GOLDEN YEARS!

Seconds have turned into minutes
Minutes have turned into immaculate hours
Hours have turned into cherished days
Today it’s been 50 years…golden years!

This world’s dearest gentleman
And the sweetest lady ever
Both gifts of natural love
Gave n’ hazarded all…for us.

Had something been miscalculated
Had one said... "I don’t"
Had one given up along the way
None of us would be.

Risky yet sweet
That all our destinies
Lay with only two
On 9th August 1958

Fifty golden years ago
You lay a foundation
You planted a tree
Today your fruits overflow.

Today is great!
Today is special!
We love you!
We thank you!